Gabriel's Guilt
by casimchr000
Summary: NO LONGER a One-Shot; (due to persistant readers.) SUMMARY: Gabriel would be honest; he made mistakes, but he wasn't going to kick himself over them: he forgave himself, and his opinion was the only one that mattered. But that's not exactly true; and the one person he actually cares about is about to drop in; making Gabriel feel something he never thought he'd ever feel: Guilt.
1. Suprises

**So...Dunno where this came from, but I hope you like it! I was just feeling some Gabriel/Castiel Brotherliness mushy stuff...actually came out rather angsty. I have yet to find out if this is a one shot or not; we'll see what the muse demands, or if you want more, just lemme know! I wrote this in one sitting, just for fun.**

**For those reading my other stories: I'M BACK! They have not been abandoned, and I'll post a chapter for each in-progress fic (maybe more than one,) this week, and we'll be back to weekly updates for everything after that! **

**Here's the disclaimer for this story...**

**DISCLAIMER: All of the wonderful Supernatural goodness is not from me: pretty much if it sounds familiar its not me. I do not own this (but oh the things I would do if I did...hehehe. **

**Anywho... READ ON!**

Gabriel wasn't stupid. Of course he wasn't stupid! He was awesome. Just ask him, he'll tell you! Don't ask anyone else though, you won't get very flattering responses.

Gabriel wasn't so stupid as to believe that others would forgive him for all of his misdeeds. He would be honest though; he'd tell you that he hadn't made any more mistakes than anyone else has. Everybody makes mistakes, he would be foolish to hold everything he'd done wrong against himself. Others were more than happy to do that for him.

He forgave himself for all the mistakes he'd made. He was fine with who he was, flaws and all. He only ever regretted one thing; and it was a doozy.

Leaving Heaven after Lucifer's fall was the best decision for him. Self-preservation, was what that was, and he was right to do so.

Leaving his baby brother behind? That was the no-no.

Most angels didn't bother with the fledglings; why would they? They were to be trained, given positions, and that was that. They weren't coddled and cared for and loved, not the way humans did with their offspring. Baby angels weren't offspring, not really. There were no family units found in Heaven, Just God the Father, and everyone else as a brother.

Gabriel followed these beliefs, as all of heaven did. At least until the last of the fledglings.

Gabriel remembered the slight disinterest most of the garrison responded with when they heard that their father was ceasing in the creation of new angels, that he would make one more, and then he was done. No one seemed to really care, there were enough angels, there was no need for anymore, they had plenty, and angels didn't really die, so they were content.

But Gabriel was interested. Their father was done with creating more angels, that was fine, but before he could stop; he had to make just one more? Why not quit cold turkey? Gabriel could find no logic in the Father's decision, but like a good soldier, he didn't question him.

The day the fledgling was finished, Gabriel waited eagerly to see him, the only one eager to lay eyes on the new, and the last, to join the garrison. Michael waited as well, out of duty, but he seemed only to want to make his required appearance, and then return to more important work. Gabriel was excited, why, he wasn't exactly sure, at least not until he saw the babe.

The new fledgling was beautiful. Tiny white fluffy plumage adorned his back, his cheeks flushed, his impossibly blue eyes inquisitive. When the babe caught Gabriel's eye, he smiled; a bemused little thing that asked, "And what exactly is going on here?" Gabriel immediately melted, and from that moment forward, Gabriel would always hold a soft spot for the youngest angel.

Gabriel, as archangel, need have little to do with simple foot soldiers, but he personally trained the new babe, raising him and keeping an eye on him. Raphael mocked that angels didn't need their own guardian angels; but Gabriel ignored him and the new babe adored the archangel. Michael, whom Gabriel was sure would've protested, said nothing, only observing with a dark scowl emblazoned on his face. Gabriel couldn't be bothered to question him, as he taught his fledgling to fly, and then to fight, and what it meant to be an angel.

But Gabriel refused to raise the babe as a mindless drone, heaven had enough of those; so Gabriel instead taught him to appreciate the flowers, to adore the humans, (whom were NOT to be called mud monkeys, though they were funny to watch, and the fledgling would agree, weren't the humans marvelous!?) to question everything and to be strong. He treated the babe as a son more than as a brother; and Gabriel; the untouchable, mighty archangel, gained a fledgling shaped weak spot, but Gabriel couldn't be bothered to care. He liked it too much.

And then Lucifer fell, and Gabriel was devastated, vowing to leave and never return, his heart wrenching at leaving the only person who really mattered to him. He knew it would break his heart, to have to say good bye.

So he didn't. He left; disappeared without a word to anyone.

He took to Earth as a Trickster, having fun and pulling pranks, gaining an alias so no one would know his true identity, vaguely keeping up with the angel gossip, not paying much attention until he heard; one day, a voice deep and rich, one he'd not heard before but strangely familiar;

_Dean Winchester is saved. _

Gabriel frowned at the voice; then shook his head. He couldn't place it. But Dean Winchester? Oh, that name, he knew, and he knew it very well. It had been awhile since he'd messed with the Winchester boys; maybe he'd go pay them a visit, but first? There was a lot of information he needed to catch up on, and some old friends whom he knew would know what was happening; he'd pay them a visit first, (because they knew how to party, and Gabriel had always been the kind to eat his dessert first, if you catch his drift,) and then, he'd see what the boys had been up to.

Gabriel couldn't breathe. One couldn't tell by looking at him, his easy grin, was his trademark, and the Winchesters were too distracted to notice that it was faked, (what with his fabulous, if he said so himself, changing channels prank,) but it was.

His fledgling was here. His babe, all grown up, and with a terrible fashion sense, but here. Helping the Winchesters, which was surprising, the glance he caught of his fledgling's wings surprising him as well. He hadn't let his babe get a word in before he'd thrown him out, he couldn't reveal his identity, but the charred black of his wings told Gabe he knew what voice he would've heard.

His babe; now no longer a babe; working with the humans.

His Castiel; all grown up, and Gabriel was ecstatic to see him, but also nervous. From the disdain and shock he'd seen etched onto his angel's face; Castiel wasn't happy to see him.

Gabriel didn't do guilt; it was a nasty emotion for humans to deal with. No archangel would ever lower themselves to feel such a thing as guilt.

But Gabriel felt just that.

Gabriel the archangel found himself smothered by guilt.

And the only person he could blame was himself.

**THE END! **

**...or not? Lemme know if you want more or not, and I'll give you what you want! (to a degree, I give myself creative license, so hah!) **

**Hope you enjoyed it, tell me what you want to see, and I'll see what I can do! **

**I love you all, dear readers, in that totally platonic and non-creepy (kinda creepy) way that I am most familiar with! Sending you kind thoughts and warm wishes!**


	2. Hey Bro!

**You asked for more: YOU GET MORE! I'm excited; I've decided to make Gabriel the reason Castiel is so fond of the humans. ALSO: I have decided to continue this story, so it will be multiple chapters; but I have a dilemma; y'see, two roads diverged in a road; and this story could go both ways...I'll explain after the chapter, but I have ideas, and this story IS going places! **

**This chapter is a mix; baby bro Cas/big bro Gabe, so check it out! I LOVE Baby Cas Big Bro Gabe fan art! If you know of some great ones, let me know! They're my favorite thing! **

**Disclaimer: All of the wonderful Supernatural goodness is not from me: pretty much if it sounds familiar its not me. I do not own this (but oh the things I would do if I did...hehehe.)**

Gabriel remembered when Castiel was very young; just barely walking, his eyes constantly roving, trying to take in everything all around him at once, and Gabriel had taken him to the Garden. Castiel loved to be in the garden more than anything, which was a trait Gabe possessed as well. The Garden was something special; a beauty that rivaled everything and won. Gabe and Castiel often whiled away the time in the garden, enjoying many moments of closeness, but the particular instance Gabe had in mind was not a memory of contentment: it was one of fear.

Gabriel had dozed off, Castiel snuggled gently into the crook of his arm as the two lay curled together on the ground, for Gabriel to wake up hours later with Castiel nowhere in sight. Gabriel had panicked, sweeping the garden with a speed he didn't know that he'd possessed; to find Castiel no longer in the garden. Gabriel made a dash for the exit and began searching frantically for the missing babe.

He found Castiel; but not alone. Uriel and the archangel Raphael stared sternly down at the young angel, who stood on shaking feet, facing them, his feet precariously close to the edge of a cliff. Gabriel watched the exchange for a moment, as Raphael muttered a few harsh word, and Castiel teetered in response; right off the edge of the cliff.

Gabriel's heart lodged in his throat and he prayed that he would make it in time; arms outstretched to reach Castiel before he hit the ground, knowing the babes wings were not strong enough yet to fly.

He reached the babe just in time, his arms cradling the boy close to his chest, Castiel whimpering and holding tightly to Gabe, but no tears escaped him.

Gabriel approached Raphael and Uriel, both of whom smirked insolently, only angering Gabe further.

"What were you thinking?!" He roared, seeing through the two's bravado to know that they were quite frightened of him. "Castiel can't fly yet, why would you allow him to be so close to the edge? What are you playing at?"

Uriel was silent in the face of Gabriel's ire, but Raphael only smirked once again. "The boy is to be a mere foot soldier; he's of no importance; I don't understand why you would coddle the babe so. He should be learning flight with the rest of his garrison, not being spoiled by you. If he were with his garrison, he would already know how to fly."

Gabriel bristled. "Are you saying that I'm not doing right by Castiel?"

Raphael laughed, low and mocking. "I'm saying that the babe is none of your concern; he should be more educated than he is; and that you are doing him no favors by treating him the way you do." Raphael opened his mouth to say more, but went silent; gaze focused somewhere behind Gabriel's soldier. Gabriel turned around to come face to face with Michael, whose face was set in a stern expression: eyes taking in everything; whimpering Castiel who clung tightly to Gabriel, Raphael who smirked again, Uriel who avoided everyone's gaze, looking down guiltily, and Gabriel, face alight in anger, arms curled protectively around the young fledgling.

With a simple jerk of his head, Michael ordered Raphael and Uriel away, and once they had taken their leave, he turned to face Gabriel, who only tightened his grip.

Michael raised a brow at the protective gesture, but spoke lightly. "If you want to keep him, you'd best begin training him. Were he to fall behind, I would have to recommend he be placed in the garrison on a more permanent basis.

Gabriel loosened his grip slightly, watching closely as Michael moved to walk past him, ever so gently brushing a hand over Castiel's hair before flying off.

Gabriel grinned slightly, murmuring softly to Castiel, who had loosened his grip on Gabe once the other angels had flown off.

"It's okay, Castiel. I'll teach you to fly soon, and it won't be scary at all, it'll be the greatest feeling ever. I'm sorry I wasn't there, babe, but I promise you, I'll always be there to catch you when you fall. I promise. I won't leave you."

Castiel had taken him at his word.

And not three years later; Gabriel would break it.

**PAGE BREAK PAGE BREAK PAGE BREAK PAGE BREAK PAGE BREAK PAGE BREAK**

Changing Channels was Gabriel's favorite prank by far. The prank got about five hundred times better, when the victims, excuse him, participants, went along with it, and Gabriel could just sit back and enjoy the show, (pun intended). With the Winchesters, it was just an added bonus that he could pass along the message, mess with them, and get a good deal of quality entertainment out of it.

He'd known that someone was trying to get through his illusion, but he hadn't put much thought into who that would be; he'd merely snapped his fingers, knowing a few more of his illusions would appear and rough the guy up, then throw him out.

But then the intruder had appeared, and the Winchesters knew him, and someone that powerful was DEFINITELY worth his attention, but then he finally caught sight of who exactly it was…and Gabriel would have recognized those blue eyes anywhere.

His baby bro, bursting out of the elevator, wearing khaki and looking pissed, apparently buddy-buddy with the Winchesters. He would've let the scene unfold if Castiel hadn't attempted to whisk the boys out; no, as much as he wanted to know what his Castiel was doing here, he had a point to make with the Winchesters, and he'd chat with his baby bro later.

His brother was a lot more powerful than Gabriel remembered, jumping into his game for a second time; and this time, he knew too much.

"You okay?" The other Winchester asked worriedly, (which Gabriel would ask about that worrying tone later,)

"I don't have much time," Castiel spoke quickly, scratches on his face, (probably from the guards, who were told to keep him contained, though they weren't supposed to hurt him, another thing he'd have to deal with.)

"What happened?" Sasquatch asked.

"I got out." Was all Castiel said.

"From where?" Dean demanded, but Castiel ignored him.

"Listen: Something is not right. This thing is much more powerful than it should be."

"What thing…the Trickster?" Dean clarified.

"If it is a trickster," Castiel spoke, eyes bright with answers, answers Gabriel didn't want the Winchesters to know.

So he intervened. Threw Castiel into the wall, duct taped his mouth, and popped in, a grin on his face that was entirely fake; though the boys wouldn't notice.

"Hello! Thank you, thank you!" Gabriel turned to face his baby brother, the brother he'd raised and cared for, the one he'd loved above all others, and grinned again.

"Hello Castiel," He said brightly, his insides crumbling. Then he waved his hand; and Castiel disappeared.

Gabriel wasn't stupid, not about most things anyway. His angel protection program had been working wonders; but the only mistake he'd ever own up to, the only one that caused him guilt; it seemed that it would never leave him alone. He'd put Castiel in a lookalike: the garden they'd loved so much. It wasn't the real garden, which was located in heaven, but it had the same feel. Gabriel had thought, maybe, after he'd messed with the Winchesters and sent them on their way, that he could speak reason to his baby brother, not apologize, per say, but convince him to forgive him anyway, and maybe stay with him, on earth. He should've taken Castiel with him when he left; it was his one regret. He foolishly thought that maybe he could make up for it, start over, and he wouldn't be alone anymore.

Then the Winchesters trapped him in a ring of Holy Fire, and demanded Castiel's release. Reluctantly Gabriel snapped his fingers, and Castiel appeared, eyes so angry that Gabriel wasn't sure Plan A would've worked even if he'd had a chance to execute it.

"You okay?" Dean asked. Which just rubbed Gabriel the wrong way. He didn't like the thought of anyone worrying about his brother, his baby.

Castiel glared at him, breathing heavily, before turning to Dean and softening ever so slightly. Which Gabriel did not like AT ALL. "I'm fine."

Castiel turned his glacial glare back to Gabriel.

"Hello Gabriel."

Despite the severity of the moment; Gabriel grinned at the gravelly voice that came from his baby, speaking his name.

"Hey bro." Gabe answered nastily, keeping his weepy girl emotions in check. "How's the search for Daddy going? Let me guess, awful!"

Castiel's countenance grew fierce, and he said nothing.

Outwardly, Gabriel shrugged, but inside, he winced.

"Alright," Dean spoke, breaking up the staring contest. "We're out of here. C'mon Sam."

Gabriel panicked as they started walking away, and he let it show. "Okay, uh, guys? So what, you're just going to leave me here, forever?

Dean stopped and turned to face him. "No. We're not. Because we don't screw with people the way you do. And for the record? This isn't about some prize fight between your brothers, or some destiny that can't be stopped. This is about you being too afraid to stand up to your family."

Gabriel frowned fiercely, knowing he was going to have to think long and hard about what he was doing; (and his revenge, no one gets the jump on him, NO ONE.) Dean pulled the fire extinguisher lever, the water putting out the holy fire and setting him free.

The Winchesters left the warehouse, Castiel the last one to leave. He paused at the door to look long and hard at Gabriel, and Gabe returned the stare, wanting to say something, but not knowing anything that would work. Castiel was the one to break the stare, following the Winchesters out.

Gabriel stood there in that warehouse, free to go, but too busy thinking. He had some decisions to make, he knew, and hard ones at that, but first? He really needed something made of sugar.

**SO THIS IS IT! Chapter Two. I have several ideas for chapter 3: I could time jump all the way to season nine and pull a #NOTDEAD or we could go AU from here on out. Anyone have any preferences? Also: anything specific anyone want to see? If not; my muse will decide for all of us! This isn't plotted out; it's still on an as my muse works basis, but by Monday I should have a more general idea of what's going on. **

**As always, I love you all, dear readers, in that platonic and not creepy (kinda creepy) way that I do so well!**


	3. A brotherly chat

**CHAPTER THREE! This is what the muse demanded, so here you go! Hope you enjoy it!**

**Disclaimer: All of the wonderful Supernatural goodness is not from me: pretty much if it sounds familiar its not me. I do not own this (but oh the things I would do if I did...hehehe.)**

"You're fighting for the wrong side."

The glare Castiel threw him was deadly, and Gabriel winced. Not his best beginning argument, he'd admit.

"You charge me with fighting for the wrong side; well at least I've chosen a side, Gabriel. At least I'm fighting for something, instead of hiding behind my own insecurities and doubts." Castiel hissed.

Gabriel winced. "This meeting was not supposed to be a hostile one."

Castiel snorted. "Really? From where I'm standing, you would have to forgive me if I believed the opposite."

Castiel glanced pointedly to the holy fire that surrounded him.

Gabriel shrugged. "I assure you, young one, I would've asked nicely if I thought you would've accepted."

Castiel said nothing; but nor did he look away.

"So how've you been?" Gabriel waved his hand, and a chair appeared in the center of the holy fire that surrounded Castiel, and Gabriel sat down in his own chair, motioning for Castiel to do the same with his. "I assume, seeing as you are now affiliated with the Winchesters, that you are in discord the rest of the heavenly host?"

Castiel stayed standing, eyes widening in realization, then squinting in anger. "Whatever your plan is this time, Gabriel: I will not allow you to use me to get to the Winchesters,"

Gabriel laughed. "Relax, Castiel. I don't want the Winchesters at the moment. I want you."

Castiel tilted his head slightly glare disappearing in his confusion. "Why?"

And for a moment, Gabriel couldn't breathe.

His babe, His fledgling, stood before him after centuries of silence, and mere moments ago, Gabriel could've said with certainty that the fledgling angel he'd raised and taught to fly was gone, grown out of the inquisitive nature that Gabriel had fostered, matured out of the curious head tilt and open gaze he had always used as a child when he'd wanted an answer to the question he never seemed to stop asking: why? But in this moment, in the worn face of a man Gabriel had never met, Gabe saw the child he'd raised, the babe who, despite being abandoned, had survived.

And that left Gabriel speechless.

"Because," Gabriel stood up from his chair and began to pace. "Because I made a mistake. Not leaving mind you, the paths the host has taken recently has only confirmed my belief that leaving was my best decision, but I shouldn't have left you." He snapped his fingers and the holy fire dissipated. Gabriel sat back down in his chair; watching to see what Castiel would do.

Castiel stared at the holy fire for a moment before he sighed heavily and took a seat in his own chair, shaking his head slightly. Gabriel was afraid to breathe, afraid the sound of his exhale would send Castiel away.

Castiel pinned Gabriel with his bright blue eyes. "You left me." He accused, and Gabriel saw again the fledgling he'd left behind.

"I did." Gabriel admitted.

"You didn't even say goodbye."

"I couldn't." Gabriel huffed, a wry grin on his face. "I'm not one for goodbyes."

Castiel nodded once, before a thought hit him. "How did you know I was with the Winchesters?"

"I didn't." Gabriel smirked. "I find the Winchesters to be highly amusing, and whenever I have free time, I help them out." Castiel snorted, and Gabriel flashed him a grin, that Castiel returned, but just barely. Still, the fleeting sight of that smile made something inside Gabriel weep like a little girl. He kept that part hidden of course; but he couldn't deny that it was there.

"The lessons I've taught them might not be ones they like, but they're necessary. They can thank me later."

"Gabriel." Castiel admonished.

Gabriel winked at his baby bro. "Seeing you with the Winchesters is actually quite shocking for me. I think you're totally stupid, but," Gabriel hesitated before going for it. "It does give me hope."

"Hope for what?"

"Castiel," Gabriel laughed, changing the subject, "Why are you helping the Winchesters?"

"Because I believe in what they're doing. Because I believe in them."

"So it all comes down to faith, does it?"

"It always comes down to faith."

"Now who taught you that?" Gabriel laughed.

Castiel smiled, a simple quirk of the lips, but it was genuine, and it made something inside Gabriel soften. "You would not believe me, but you did."

Castiel was right: Gabriel didn't believe him.

"After you disappeared, I was put with the rest of my garrison, taught what they were. Rules, obligation, duty, honor. I barely remember most of the lessons you taught me in my youth; but a few are so deeply ingrained that I would not easily forget them. Faith was one of them."

Gabriel laughed. "Of all the lessons that I've taught you, never once did I mention the word faith."

Castiel tilted his head. "You taught me about flowers."

"Yeah, about flowers," Gabriel stressed, "Not,"

"You taught me about the resilience of flowers." Castiel added with a raised brow.

Gabriel sighed. "I guess I did. Oops."

Castiel shook his head slowly. "You still haven't answered my question."

"Hmm?" Gabriel asked, having forgotten what Castiel had asked.

"Hope for what?"

"Oh, yes, that." Gabriel shrugged. "I have hope for that mind of yours. That it will choose its own path, make its own decisions. From the way I've seen you interact with the Winchesters, I don't think I have to worry about much."

Castiel shrugged.

There was a moment of companionable silence, that Gabriel of course had to break.

"I still think you're wrong." Gabriel added with a pointed finger.

"I still think you need to choose a side." Castiel admonished. But then he relaxed. "I suppose this is what brothers do, though? Disagree?"

Gabriel laughed. "If you're going by the Winchesters example, disagree would be an understatement."

He sobered a moment later, and Gabriel's sudden intensity made Castiel nervous.

"Does that mean, that you still call me your brother?" Gabriel asked lightly, as if the answer meant nothing, even though it meant everything.

"We will see." Castiel hedged, a cell phone ring interrupting their conversation.

Castiel made a face at the phone.

"Let me guess, Sasquatch and your boyfriend." Gabriel joked, though he was mostly serious.

Castiel sent Gabriel a look, not answering. "I have to go."

"Fine. Get out of here. But I'm assuming that next time I propose we chat, " Gabriel made a circle with his hand, "We can forego the fire and converse in a less damp setting?"

Castiel's face was unreadable. "I will speak with you later." Then he was gone.

Gabriel grinned. "Promise?" he hollered, even though his baby angel was long gone.

Well. That had gone better than he expected. A repeat performance was going to have to happen: and soon.

But first; feelings made Gabriel crave sugar, and he was in current need of a LOT of sugar.

**FIRST CONVERSATION: CHECK. they're not fixed, not even close, but they're talking, now. I haven't yet decided where they're going; my muse has yet to direct me, but this is what I've got so far; and I think I like it! Let me know what else you want to see, I'm going to, over the next few days, start mapping out the rest of the story. We'll see what happens! **

**As always, I love you all in that totally platonic and not at all creepy (kinda creepy) way that I do so well. Sending you all happy thoughts and warm wishes!**


	4. Mostly Dead

**You people are bloodthirsty...and I love you all!**

**Sorry it's been a while, I got distracted. This is short, but I wanted to give you this as soon as I finished it. but first, let me complain/explain. **

**I had the direction of where this story was going to go; it was mostly mapped out too! But I've been keeping up with season nine, (I actually skipped most of season seven, except for all the episodes Cas is in, and all of season eight. I picked up with season nine, episode nine, and have seen every episode since.) and Meta Fiction 9X18 ruined me. And in all your reviews (WHICH I LOVE,) this episode has come up again and again. I agree that something must be written about this new developement.**

**This is not it.**

**But it's coming! This is the build up; what Gabriel's up to and all that jazz. Next chapter is Meta Fiction, and maybe more (?!) but I wanted to give you what I had as soon as possible, seeing as its been awhile. **

**MORE IMPORTANT INFORMATION AT THE END: But for now, onto the story!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own supernatural. If I did, there would be more Gabriel and Castiel, and Dean and Sam would not be making me so angry in the latest episodes! (anyone else upset?! seriously, hug it out guys. Calm the poop down!) Anywho, all credit of the Characters Winchesters and Co. go to their respective parties, which is, unfortunately, not me. **

**Here we go!**

Make no mistake about it: Gabriel was dead.

But also make no mistake: Gabriel was only dead because he wanted to be. He was perfectly amenable to live the life of a dead angel; no responsibilities, nobody trying to kill you or forcing you to be productive, but also….nothing to do. Except watch the train wreck that was the year 2014, anyway.

Castiel had been right, before. Not choosing a side was worse than choosing the wrong one, and Gabriel thought that maybe, Castiel and his boy toys had a chance. They had a bigger chance if Gabriel helped them of course, and jerk that he was, all Gabriel really cared about at this point was the fledgling angel he'd left behind, so he'd stepped up. Then he'd died.

Maybe he wasn't as great with the ladies as he thought.

Sexual prowess aside though, the one thing Gabriel WAS good at, was his illusions.

It's always better to approach a woman (especially an angry one,) as an illusion first.

Which was a good thing; seeing as he'd been murdered.

Then, idiot that he was, he still stuck around to help the Winchesters, at least long enough to have an angstier than usual conversation with big brother Lucifer; which only made him more dead than before.

So he did the only thing he could do: he threw himself into porn.

Which sounds very wrong; but Gabriel didn't mean it in that way; persay.

At least he gave the boys and Cas a fighting chance, one more thing to use against Lucifer when the big showdown finally occurred.

And it did; and his little advice saved the day; no thanks necessary.

Although, a little gratitude would've been nice.

But of course, he was dead, what did he have to say about it? All he could really do, in his state of deadness, was sit back and enjoy the show.

And what a show it was.

The closest Gabriel had ever come to having children was Castiel, and Gabriel didn't understand how parents could just sit back and watch their precious little angels make horrendous decisions. He supposed most parents had faith that said precious little angels wouldn't be so stupid.

Apparently his precious little angel was just an idiot.

The two goons he kept company with weren't all that bright either.

Accident prone, would be the nice way to put it.

Gabriel preferred idiots.

The Winchesters rotten luck was really what it was; their rotten luck combined with all their personal issues and smothered in the amount of people that they managed to piss off on a near daily basis the real reason they couldn't have nice things.

Honestly, Gabriel got so fed up sometimes, he almost became undead.

Almost.

He was dead. That didn't mean that if he so chose, he couldn't become undead.

It just took a lot of juice, and after porn, he just didn't have all that much juice left.

Which sounded really bad; but Gabriel had said worse.

Some of the stunts the Winchesters and Cas had pulled though, (the titanic, breaking the mind wall between Sam and his crazy, working with Crowley, lying to his only allies, working with Balthy, killing Balthy, the leviathans, taking over Sam's crazy, need he say more? He could, were there enough time,) had made him nearly ready to use up all his reserves just to knock some sense into his angel, though he didn't. He still had the hope that Cas would pull it together.

Then Megaturd.

Frickin Metatard.

Gabriel couldn't fathom how a war verse angels and demons ended, only to surface a double civil war: demon verse demon, angel verse angel with a human duo fighting to end them both. But then again, when he thought about it, it had always been a civil war, with Lucifer on one side, and the rest of the angels on the other, and the Winchesters had always been caught in the middle.

For the first time in his life, Gabriel itched to be out there, fighting, in the trenches.

It was very weird for him.

Gabriel was a messenger, he wasn't a soldier. So why did he feel a need to be out there?

Because that's where Castiel was. And Gabriel wanted to be where Castiel was.

But there was still the whole dead thing.

So when the transformer angel (Gabriel didn't do names) threw him a raggedy script and mockingly told him to play his role, (an irony that Gabriel hadn't missed, but steadfastly ignored,) he decided to go for it.

Not for Megabyte and all his stupid viruses. Because it was illusions, something Gabriel was good at, and surprises, something Gabriel enjoyed, and Castiel, his baby brother, and Gabe had missed him most of all.

But those were not the reasons he would list if anyone asked him why.

No, if anyone asked, his reasoning would be simple;

Being dead is boring.

Duh.

**END CHAPTER.**

**So in regards to updating this story; I am currently in the middle of three Avenger FanFics, two giant crossovers (Superwhovengelock, and superwhovengelockpotter, if you must know,) this supernatural FanFic, and one other (that I'm super excited about!), as well as numerous one shots, and real life. I know, I'm crazy. Only a few are actually posted, but the rest will be showing up over the next few months. This story still has my attention, though it's not on a regular schedule and with all my other various activities I will do my best to keep the updates on a timely schedule. **

**I seriously love you all, platonically of course. I hope you all have the best day, and I would like to mention, though I don't do this too often, that reviews make me so happy! I do love to hear from you all, especially my more consistent reviewers (you know who you are, shout out! You're wonderful.) So review if you'd like! Thanks a ton, and the next chapter should be up SOON.**


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